You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
