I didn't shave. On purpose
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
We named our party play list daddy issues
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
