girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
