I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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