Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
