I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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