Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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