Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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