at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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