ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
