May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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