ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
