Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
