I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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