wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
