Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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