I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Randomize
