Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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