I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize