Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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