Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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