So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
