But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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