Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Randomize
