Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I am one with the molecules
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Randomize
