kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
