They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
