I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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