he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
