my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize