Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins