The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
