i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
