im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize