Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
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