he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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