Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
