Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
