he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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