You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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