you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
