$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
