so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
