I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Randomize
