He is such a slut. More and more my type.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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