They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
