My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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