dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out