I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
