Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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