dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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