I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
There r osticjed everywhere
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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